Slowpoke

Hahahahaha I'm really damn slow omg. Yesterday during the dinner with the guys, we talked about those ghost picture pranks, like video about baby and the face suddenly turns creepy. Like your friends send you a link and when you click it, that creepy picture just pop up and fill up your entire computer screen with the stupid but loudest scream you'd ever heard coz you turn on your comp's volume too high.

I mentioned about Hoa once sent me a link for online game and when I won the round 5, this creepy thing pop out with the scream *and I was with my earpiece*

So Ys mentioned about this prank where the face will pop out while you read a comic. I thought that it was quite a creative idea coz I've never heard of it before, so I asked him to send me the link. But I totally forgotten about that.

This morning I saw Ys posted this thing on my fb wall.

Yep, this one

So I was like, uh? What's with that picture? and what is that "cute" referring to? I thought that he was trying to be random or something, but I don't get what he meant. So I replied this.

up to this point, I still didn't get what he meant

I was like "uhhh? why JY? Why Ys so random??" Though I didn't understand, I just played along with him.
Then at night, I saw Jy's reply for the post.

up to this point, you should know what's the link about

Again, I was like "what??? why these ppl so weird today? what bad feeling? It's just a picture of a guy what. And I show you a picture, but you mentioned 'watch' out of nowhere. What toking you???"

After that, I decided to click on the link once again and scroll all the way down. At first I thought it was nothing coz all the words are in Korean, and I don't understand a shit. I realised that it's a series of comic but the bell didn't ring yet. So I just kept on pressing the arrow key on my keyboard and then the screen came to a stop where this bloody face pop out.

We have a badass here 

And I was like WHAT THE FUCK???? I was stunt for a moment and LOL-ed after that. HAHAHAHAHA. Now then I remember about what Ys said LOL. So I went to reply Jy's comment and told them about how slow I was LOLOLOL. Fooled. Totally. 

Now I know why Ys mentioned about Jy there, coz Jy is super scared of these types of scenes LOL

Then I went back to the page as I thought that the comic hasn't ended yet, and indeed.

Here comes the next next screen LOL

Hahahahaha Nice one. I was speechless. Though I know that the picture alone wasn't scary at all, but I was really scrolling down without any preparation or anticipation for something like this. At all. LOL

Alright, so that's the end of my story for tonight. For those who want to experience the whole thing personally, feel free to click on the link below. and. ENJOY! :D

http://comic.naver.com/webtoon/detail.nhn?titleId=350217&no=20&weekday=tue

Nights! Sweet Dreams~ 

The Red Day

Alright, so the title of this post is actually referring to the first day of my period for this month. This morning, I woke up feeling slightly wet and uncomfortable. So I went to washroom to check and indeed, my "great-aunt" came to greet me. Immediately, I felt the menstrual pain and I swear, this could be the second time I've ever felt so pain throughout all my periods before. So, I immediately grabbed  a slice of bread and just stuff it into my mouth so that I could eat some painkillers. 

What makes me feel sian even more was the fact that I actually got an appointment to smooth-rebond my hair, which means I need to go out early and sit at the salon for at least 4hrs? 

Alright, double sian.

In the afternoon, I texted few ppl like Crystal and Hoa for dinner but both of them had plans at night. So, I tried my luck texting Edmund since we had not have dinner together with Jq, Ys, Jy and Sx for superrrrr long time, miss them so much. And yeap, they all agreed, whooooo! :D

Before I went to Edmund's house, I bought bread from BreadTalk and forced myself to eat again so that I could have the second round of painkillers. (It was really pain, okay?)

Had a wonderful evening cacthing up with all their jokes about their classmates and school. Other poly seems to have much interesting as compared to NP and in fact, there's no funny stories about our classmates that Jq and I could share. But nvm, it was a very enjoyable evening. Seriously, I could say that nothing is more enjoyable than to be with this crazy bunch of people I've known in Secondary school. *ohhh I miss those days*

Reached home around 10pm+ after buying lots of sanitary pads from Shop & Save. I can really open up a shop and sell all my sanitary pads man, I've got different brands and different lengths, that's exaggerating I know, but since I haven't found a really suitable ones to stick with, what to do? :o

I just realised that the pain was getting stronger as I reach home, for whatever reason, so I asked my aunt for painkillers as mine wasn't effective enough, today. (Just for today)

So I proceed to the store room to dig out all the sanitary pads I have and I found this! 

Present from Crystal during her Taiwan trip!

Hahahaha, and tell you what, the things that I'm going to share below will be a super epic joke that I've ever created! You'll rank me as the stupidest idiot you've ever known in your life! LOLOLOL

Yeah, it's a sanitary pad packaging. I really had never doubted that packaging before, and because it was really soft when I pressed down, I've always thought that it's a pack of sanitary pads!

So when Crystal gave it to me, I was like "uh??? sanitary pads???" 

*LOL, for that moment, I thought that Crystal was really the cutest girl I've ever know, Hahahahaha REALLYYYY* 

Hmmm, come to think of it, I've never opened it before, I didn't even know about the size and the length of the pads inside. I wonderrrrrr.

But before I opened it up, I started to really observing carefully the packaging because I thought it was really nicely decorated. Then, I realised sth amiss. Uhhhh? Expiry date???  What's next? 

WHATTTT? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? NUTRITION FACTS?

I was like WHATTT? ARE YOU FREAKING SERIOUS? Since when does sanitary pad "nutritious"??? UHHHH????

My phone camera was lousy, so I decided to type it out

Then I started to analyse every single chinese word carefully and I saw 棉花糖 and I was like LOLOLOL ROFL LMAO OMG HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I CANNOT STOP LAUGHING MAN, OMG CRYSTALLLLL OMG HOW DUMB I WAS!!!!! 

And she gave it to me like 2 months ago? I've not opened up coz I thought I'd only be able to use it when my period come, LOLOLOLOL

Inside was so cute LOLOLOL

Marshmallow! :)

HHAHAHAHAHA I still cannot believe how stupid I am, really! Sorry Crystal, for 辜负 your present LOLOL and thanks! 别致的包装，甜在心里! Hahahahaha

If my period never come, I might not have ever opened this up, will I?

I bet Crystal will be laughing mad reading this post.

Super stupid joke for the night LOL. What a stupid me. XDDDDD

Outcast

P.S. before you start to read this post, don't read if you are Vanessa or Jocelyn (I know you guys don't stalk me, but just in case there's such thing called coincidence), coz this blog is the only place where I can really say my 真心话 already, idk where to go if I cannot do it here. I don't want any of you to feel bad or backstabbed or angry coz of the things I'm going to say. It's just my PMS period again.

Alright, then I shall start saying what I really want to rant about.

I don't like this. I really really don't like this feeling. The feeling of being an outcast, outsider, being extras, these feelings are back. 

I thought I've found the clique that can really last for my next 2 years in NP, but I doubt that it will last long too. Lately my female friends in my class have started making friends with the guys, R created this whatsapp thing. whatsapp. I'm so anti whatsapp already. Why can't I afford a phone with whatsapp? Why do I have to work so hard but still worry about money? Why am I not born in a better family? Why unlucky things always happen on me? Why am I always the one being forgotten, being outcast, being sacrificed among my friends?

Okay, let's talk about whatsapp. That's the main reason of why I was being left out in TA30. I really really hate how they are focused only in their own jokes which I do not understand and no one bother to explain to me coz it's a long story for me to understand. If I got whatsapp, I'll know. 

That time they went for outing without even informing me and they called it a class outing. "class" uh you say??? I didn't fucking know a shit about it. Karin told me "uh? u don't know meh? I thought they got say in whatsapp?" I gave her that look and replied "how would I know? since when do I have whatsapp?" and she gave me that guilty look. 

Now, this class is creating whatsapp group again. All their inner jokes, their whatever zoos, whatever papi mami thingy, no I DON'T UNDERSTAND. Why must mankind create phone? Why not like last time where youngsters foster their friendships through outdoor bonding, face-to-face contact? Why must there be phone,  whatsapp created which result in ppl who cannot afford those luxury stuff being outcast? Okay, it's not a luxurious thing for you to own iPhone, Samsung galaxy, blackberry alright? but for me, just by signing Sony experia contract, I need to make sure I've got enough pay to support that monthly payment okay? For the sake of those whatsapp and friends thingy? No, I don't have parents to support my expenses, they cannot okay, I don't want to increase their burden but I increase my own, but where does this burden really come from? I know, my friends didn't force me to buy smartphones but who wants to be left out? This feeling is terrible kay? Sometimes I really hate the fact of how poor I am. Why can't I be like the rest, just 伸手要钱 from parents? R complained about how she think that she's being treated like maid to do housework, but what's the big deal of housework? we are adults, we are suppose to help for this thing isn't it? I do housework kay? I do housework everyday when I'm still in Indonesia kay? Now it's even worse, you can imagine how I handwash my clothes myself, iron my clothes, sweep the floor, etc etc etc + regular work. Yeah, they always say that I so hiong coz I work almost everyday, so yours is no big deal as compared to mine. Whenever there's overseas trip (OIP) announced, I can only let those chances being taken by others, I didn't express how I want to go so badly, but I do. I've never went once. But I don't even dare to let my mom know. 

 I hate working like a cow, sometimes I just feel like a money-making robot, but I do feel tired okay? I don't like this, I'm so tired. I'm so poor that I got no time to bond with my friends (coz I need to work), don't have smartphone to whatsapp with the rest, cannot go OIP and I miss those learning opportunities, are these reasonable reasons for me to lose most of the friends and opportunities around me?

Like when I need people to sit with me during tutorial ytd because I never do my tutorial ytd. Just that once okay, coz it's like 3 tables per row. I just wanted someone to sit with me for 1 lesson ytd, am I asking for too much? but V told me that J they all ask her to sit with them. Uh? What's this? So from the start they all want her to sit with them, knowing that there are only 3 tables. Then, where do I sit? Behind, Again.

Just want to clarify, I always sit behind, but it doesn't mean that I ENJOY SITTING BEHIND ALONE okay? I don't want to bee seen as an outcast that's why I always try to join back they all asap after each lessons end so that I can be seen as a group again. No, I don't mind sitting alone behind,really don't mind. coz I thought it'd be unreasonable to force someone to sit with me, right? unless you really take me as friend and genuinely want to sit with me. I thought by being the one sacrificing, I'll be more easy to get along with. But why everytime is ME? why must be me?

and about last week, I managed to squeeze into the inner table, so 2 tables left. I thought that V will be sitting at the last table coz R is in the toilet. But V sat behind and left that seat for R. I felt bad for V okay, I really felt bad coz I always sit behind alone, so awkwardly alone when you have a clique. R sat on that seat when she came back but moved behind after 5 mins to sit with V. I don't think V texted R or sth, that's 自动. I was like, "what exactly am I?" Now I feel so extra, extra that I want to cry sososososo much when I blog this during Bstats lesson. Because of me, V has to sit behind alone. Because of V alone, R has to move to the back to pei her. Because of this, J cannot sit with V and R, I'm very extra. 

But if they really make some changes from now on just because they know about this, I'm not going to appreciate much coz most of us can read faces, we know what's true and what's fake.

When I nv mention, it doesn't mean that I have no feeling, I  just don't want to be seen as the bad guy, but coz of this, I can only endure the pain myself. 

This morning I was late for FFA tutorial, and as expected, I sat alone again. No one texted me anymore to ask if I was otw or I just wake up or I was sick or for whatever reason I was late. But nvm okay. 

Class ended quite early today but they refused to leave the room. So I continued to sit behind quietly to see if any of them realise that I've been waiting alone since just now. I started to tweet emo stuff on twitter, but they kept on laughing with the guys. whatsapp again. When they finally stood up, no one waited for me, they just went off. I realised that I haven't even opened my mouth to talk to any of them today, but no one came to ask why am I especially quiet and anti-social today. Now I don't feel like talking to anyone today, so get lost. I feel like just leaving without saying bye to any of them when the lesson ends, but I know that I cannot, I'll still at least say bye to V, coz actually they are like so innocent. They just don't understand what's happening inside me, they don't know about my past, they don't understand how I felt when I was being treated like shit by all the friends whom I genuinely cherish so much.

I'm super exhausted, the emptiness in my heart, coz no one is genuinely showing concern around me.